Monday, February 06, 2006

Just the Facts

Here are the facts, as I understand them:

  • FACT #1: I am on Day 2 of a 3-day nip binge.
  • FACT #2: I woke up this morning, on my back, in the center of the livingroom--and I don't remember how I got there.
  • FACT #3: No one will look me in the eye and I hear whispers that mysteriously stop as I pass by.
  • FACT #4: If I had a job, I would be calling in sick because of my nip-hangover.
  • FACT #5: My mom is threatening to make me "get a job" to pay for my addiction to "kitty-smack." (Between you and me...other than ruling an empire, what is an exiled empress qualified to do?)

I think I need an intervention.


Edsel/The Pooch said...

Kukka - i was tryin' to help Beau, but didn't do so good. i'd be happy to try to help a sweet, lovely thing like you, tho. what say you come over to my place and we'll pray.....(pssst. i got some primo weed hidden, nobody knows i got it.......knock twice on the basement window....)

Max said...

Write a book...that's how I pay for the kitty crack. Oh, you have to share the royalties with your people, but they're so grateful they get some of the really good stuff!

Bonnie Underfoot said...

You looks very happy; why mess with a good thing? Edsel, can I come too? I promise to be good.

Kukka-Maria said...

You guys are right!

Edsel: Listen for a knock on the basement window.

Max: I'll consider the book deal.

Bonnie: Catnip does make me happy. It's just the awkward silences from my family and friends the next day that put me on edge.

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

Definitely get help before your name ends up in the supermarket tabloids. You already know how the papparazzi hounds royalty!

Kukka-Maria said...

The Crew: Oh my! I hadn't thought of that! The last thing I want is for one of my adoring fans to read about my catnip addiction on line at the grocery store!

I guess I'll have to be sneakier about my catnip use...because I'm not ready to quit just yet--ANDICANQUITANYTIMEIWANT!

Anonymous said...

Edsel you did too do good! I think we need to start a prayer group!

Beau said...

Edsel you did too do good. I think we need to start a prayer group!

Dianne said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Dianne said...

I can't type tonight-too much butter.
Anyway, I said hide your stash under the bed or in a slipper, they never will find it!

Tyler said...

I wanna be a cat sooo bad. That nip must be the shiznit!